Feelings of6 years too late
by Katieflood20
Summary: I didn't know where to post this the Holby or Casualty section,you'll see why when you read it! - maybe it is the right place? I don't know anyway enough dwelling! -I hope you enjoy, reviews are appreciated! X
1. Chapter 1

Feelings of.. 6 years too late.

**I had to do this. I had to.. I'm sorry, reuniting Connie and Sam!,it's been building up in my mind for some time now. Sorry if I ramble on a bit and sections seems to drag apologies in advance! **

**Enjoy! X **

Twitter - _ifyouseekatie (shameless plug...)

His heart fluttered, an odd sensation. He looked out through the window of the taxi, the rain dripping down the window, slowly he watched it race down the pane, stopping at the bottom.

Noting the hospital he was now stood in front of him, a small umbrella protecting him from the rain. People bustled around him, life went on, without him, a unwanted thought crossed his mind, he promptly dismissed it, he looked up at the building.

Closing his eyes memories moved like a conveyer belt, one woman clearly visible as images flickered through.

Connie.

He'd heard on the grapevine that she'd started working in the ED, but couldn't be sure. He rubbed his forehead, before making a move, pulling his suitcase behind him. He felt a shiver, he shook his head at the state of the weather. Forgetting just how bad it was compared to the warmth he'd living in.

Hesitation over the threshold. He didn't expect it to be so hard. Okay, after 6 years you don't expect to walk In and everyone to remember you, or start being all pally with people you don't even know. He walked in despite this.

Despite booking a 2 week holiday back to the UK, was he actually here for Connie? , just not wanting to admit it? Maybe so.

He ordered himself a coffee and took a seat, feeling odd, noting then that cafe had completely changed places. He laughed to himself feeling that maybe this wasn't all he would feel out of place with!

"Thanks" his reply as the coffee was brought to the table, a slight American twang on the end of his word.

Watching people walk past he took a sip of his coffee, grimaced, it didn't taste like the American coffee. He put the cup down, and that when he saw her, Connie. So it was true.

His heart was beating fast now, keeping up with her fast paced footsteps. She was heading straight towards him.

He gulped. Wondering wether she would even recognise him having put on a little weight, hair had grown out a little wayward too, and with his neatly trimmed bread which he'd been sporting for the past few months.

She diverted her path up to the counter not seeming to notice him.

She looked amazing. Better than ever. Noting the length of her hair, it suited her. He thought, he wondered wether to speak, anything to get her attention.

"Coffee please" she spoke her words soft, not how he remembered them. She let out a sigh. He watched her rub her eyes. This felt wrong he was sat watching her. It felt like spying but it wasn't because he knew her.

"Thank you.." She took the coffee from the lady standing there she took a long gulp.

"Connie" he gulped hard.

Connie turned around. "Yes?" She didn't recognise him at first then studied his face further. Her eyes darted across his face, the way he was sat, his demeanour. She stood silent for what felt like the longest time. An unwanted emotion washed over her. "I have to go.." She spun around quickly on her heel and headed off.

Sam stood up and dragged his suitcase behind him. "Connie.. Wait" he raced to catch up with her. She stopped.

"What do you want Sam?" She asked him in exactly the same way she used to. With that certain tone and sharpness.

It made Sam shiver slightly. He didn't really know what to say. He thought for a while. "Can we talk?"

"Not now, I'm on shift, but yes afterwards we can" her tone was much softer now. He gave her a smile which she didn't return.

For now, he would head back to the hotel he's booked himself into for the few nights. He watched her walk off.

Connie's head spun as she walked into the ED. Her hand touched her forehead. He'd walked back into her life. Uninvited. But she couldn't help the connection she still felt. He looked so different, but still the Sam she used to give the biggest lectures to. She smiled slightly, she got on with her shift.

"Grace?, how is she?" Sam asked sitting opposite Connie, at little cafe just on the outskirts of Holby, coffee and cake, for Sam. Connie on the other hand had a glass of coffee and some fruit.

Connie nodded. Studying his face further. He really looked like he'd been dragged through a hedge backwards. Jet lag she thought, or not, maybe this was his new rough look. "Fine, she's at boarding school now.." she gave a small smile.

"So you weren't joking.." Sam took a sip of coffee.

She raised her eyes brows. "Would I ever joke about my daughters future"

"Our..." He corrected her, feeling slightly disappointed. "Your hair looks lovely by the way, I like it like that"

Connie scowled. "And you didn't like it before?"

"I didn't say that" Sam shook his head.

Connie bit Into her apple, gracefully. She finished her mouthful before speaking. "Sam, why are you back, you can't just turn up..."

Sam looked at her. "A holiday, 2 weeks"

"Nice.. Is that all just a holiday, your not thinking of moving back?"

Sam nodded. "Why? Would you want me to?" He smirked.

Connie glanced down, picking up her coffee cup and answered with a firm. "No"

"I was also wondering, even though Grace is at boarding school could you pull her out for a few days is I can spend some time with her?"

Connie rolled her eyes. "She has a weekend out this week, yes I suppose so.."

Sam beamed.

"You look as if you've been through a hedge backwards Sam, you've let yourself go out there.." She spoke her words playful. "Is this our rough look?"

"Always one for compliments aren't you Connie?" Sam looked at her. "I heard that your now working in the ED? Why?"

"New challenge.." She took another bite of apple.

Sam smirked. "New domain for Connie Beauchamp you mean?.. How's your farther?" He drew his last sentence with a little caution.

Connie frowned. "How do you know?" She questioned, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

"Elliot.. He emailed me"

She raised her eyes brows "he's told you about my farther?"

"With the best of intentions Connie, he was worried about you.."

She looked him in the eyes, with much thought she decided to tell him. Open up, something she found hard. "He passed away a few months ago, god only knows how he hung on for so long.. " she let the sentence hang in the air for a moment. "He was a very poorly man, it was peace-" She almost choked on her words. Her eyes filling with tears, the emotion clearly still raw, although she hides it well.

Sam grabbed her hand. Unexpected. But needed.

"No it's okay, he had me at his side" Connie continued letting go of his hand, shaking off her emotion. Sam always wondered how she did that. Just shut off. "So tell me, how's life been for you across the pond?"

"Not all plain sailing I'll give you that" he smiled awkwardly. Connie sensed he didn't really want to say much, but with an intake of breath he told began.

After telling her Connie regretted her comment about him looking so rough. It all now making sense.

"Depression is a horrible thing Connie, some days you feel on top of the world, other days you feel so low you wonder what you've got left to give to the world, Kieran, he's been a rock, I can say that with confidence" he sighed. "But sometimes you just more, another person to lean on, he's been fantastic but he's so young he needs to life his life without worrying about his Dad.."

Connie nodded. Letting him continue.

"That's why I came over here, I needed to see wether different surroundings would help, feeling so low I just felt coming back here to Holby, old colleagues would lift me, I don't know" he smiled slightly.

She gave his hand a rub with her thumb. "And has it?"

"Seeing you, yes it has actually" he smiled.

She smiled. "Good, I'm glad" after hearing what he's been though, she was genuinely pleased for him. "Listen I have to get back to work, but if you'd like, you could come over to mine tonight, I have wine in the fridge and a few DVDs, I've been saving"

Sam's mouth dropped. Connie rolled her eyes at him. "Sorry, can you just repeat that, Connie Beauchamp inviting Sam Strachan for drink back at hers?!" His cheeky demeanour wasn't something she'd missed.

"Watch it..." Playfully narrowed her eyes. "It may do you some good, I finish about 7, If you give me your hotel address I'll see you around then?" She questioned keeping her gaze fixed, her heart sank slightly, he looked slightly unkempt, through no fault of his own.

Sam nodded smiling. "Sounds good.." He looked at her, she looked as beautiful as when he left 6 years ago. "Times change don't they?, I hate to add after all these years, we may have turned a corner, you and me"

"Your saying I've gone soft aren't you?" She rolled her eyes slightly.

"Maybe..old age" he muttered.

Connie lips parted slightly. "Cheeky bloody sod, now off you go"

Sam walked out first, Connie followed, her heels clicking on the floor. Sam turned to her just near the door.

"Thank you Connie" he hesitated slightly then hugged her.

Why did he hesitate?

Connie wrapped her arms tentatively around him. "It's okay" she pulled away. "Look after yourself and I'll see you tonight 7pm"

Sam pulled his jacket around him and headed out the door. Watching him leave Connie smiled, willing to help in anyway whilst he was here.

Maybe she had softened more than she hesitant to admit. Maybe it was the connection she felt in Sam's presence that made her stomach churn inside. Or maybe it was just because after all he was the farther to her daughter.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for the reviews - short part this one - hope you enjoy all the same ! X **

7pm came. Tiredness overcoming her Connie walked out of the ED, the rain poured as it had earlier on in the day. The day in question had been eventful what with patients rolling in left right and centre, and Sam. Oh Sam. She wondered if he was actually looking forward to tonight, or just putting on a brave face. Spending time with her just because it would take his mind of the low ebb at which depression had pushed him too.

She couldn't dwell for long, pushing her umbrella up she ran in her heels, to her car.

She climbed in, turning on the car light, Connie fixed her hair. The keys clattered as she put them ignition.

Her phone buzzed, pulling it out she had revived a text from Sam.

Don't rush from work, I'm guessing your probably shattered.

Take your time.

See you soon. Sam x

She smiled, putting the phone in her bag she revved up the car and reversed out. Turning on the radio she listening to the soft sounds of the music as she drove out the car park.

Finding the hotel 10 minutes later, she parked in the car park. Sighing briefly she climbed out, the rain had died down a little, she felt a little flustered as she entered. She took a seat in reception but not for long, she could see him, he looked different as to what she saw him earlier, he'd shaved and his hair thick mass of hair slicked back somehow.

He smiled. A smart pair of navy jeans covered his legs, a red checkered shirt on top.

"Your looking better" she smiled, standing up.

"And you look amazing" He walked with her slowly towards the door.

"Don't flatter yourself.." She spoke a playfulness to her words.

Sam looked at her. "Connie you look tired, you didn't have to do this you know.."

"What do I look, amazing or tired? make up , your mind" She smirked. "Well believe it or not I could do with the company"

Sam nodded. "I just don't want you to be the one carry all my problems.."

"Sam, you won't be" she gave him a reassuring smile.

It felt odd to Connie not seeing him the way he used to be, confident, cocky, okay that still sparks now and then but not as she remembered. Then again, maybe in his eyes

maybe she had changed as well.

The warm summer smelling Yankee candle flickered, peace surrounded them as both Connie and Sam sat in the open living room of Connie's apartment.

Big wine glasses sat on the table followed by a bottle of wine, Connie leant back on the table having poured them both a drink.

"Do you ever have low days Connie?" Sam sat back, sunk into the plush leather sofa it squeaked as he did so.

"Of course I do, everyone does.. I just hide it well"

Sam looked at her. "Your good at that.."

"It takes a lot of practice believe me!" She sipped her glass of wine.

"I thought out you a lot you know..." Sam followed suit taking a gulp of wine, the warm liquor burned his throat. "And Grace of course, when my depression was worse than It is now.." He trailed off thinking Connie didn't want to here all this, but he continued all the same.

"I used to kid myself that you really missed me, cried over me even, I guess it was a comfort to me, knowing that in my mind you missed me as such as I missed you, then I felt anger though, with you, with the world because you had cut all ties between me and my daughter" Sam watched Connie as she listened.

"I then eventually turned to drink, I can't say that was the reason, I don't know the reason. but god it wasn't pretty Connie, I could find no way out, it lasted for months" He set his wine glass down a clink as it hit the glass table. "My live was spiralling out control..." He trailed off his eyes tearing up.

Connie sat up setting her glass on the table as well. She grabbed his hand.

"I'm so scared it going to happen again..." He stared at the glass in front of him. "Scared that one drink could lead to a dozen"

"Look at me" Sam turned to face the woman, her former boss in the life that seemed so far removed from his own. "I will not let that happen, your seeing you daughter soon for the first time in 6 years, you said yourself you can't say that was the reason for your downward spiral, but if so, seeing her may offer some therapy"

Sam nodded. "Yes.."

Connie took his glass. "Should I..?" She gestured towards the sink.

"Sorry, yes I was just drinking it to be polite" A small smile formed on his lips.

Connie, now stood in the kitchen watching him, his eyes fixed on the TV. She understood the full extent of his vulnerability, the situation which had lead him to the stage of life he was at, scared, he was scared that he was going to slip back into the person he used to be just, it sounds like a couple of month prior, she knew that Sam seeing Grace was more important than ever. Connie defiantly wasn't going to let him slip away without helping him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hope you enjoy this next part! **

The weekend had arrived, the weekend Sam was both excited and nervous about. Thoughts on loop in his mind. "What if she doesn't take to me?" "What will she look like at now 8 years of age, more like Connie or more like him?" "Will she know me as "Daddy" or just a stranger off the street?"

How much has Connie told her?

He stood before the mirror in his hotel room, he studied himself. What had he become? - a man hardly recognisable, that's what. Sighing he ran his fingers through his hair in a ditch attempt to make it neater.

What will his daughter think of her farther In just a few years time? If he carries on she'll begin to understand. Understand his way, depression, drink. He didn't want to hurt her, he wanted to be a part of her life, not turn her away. He thought. Harsh, but this was reality. Sam's Strachan's reality.

Sam had to find a way to get himself sorted but he needed help, he knew this. It would take time he also knew this.

He looked tired as he slipped on a pair of jeans and a smart shirt. He hadn't packed much. He'd gotten up early especially, deep down he knew happiness, it was hard to distinguish it when he felt so down.

Sam stood at Connie's door 3 hours later. The knock hesitant. He waited for Connie to answer, he looked up saw the hall light flick on, a key turn.

"Sam" She smiled. "Come in" Connie held the door open, she was dressed casually, how he'd rarely ever seen her. A floral top, light blue jeans followed by some white pumps on foot. "How are you?" She asked shutting the door finally.

"Nervous..." He glanced around, his hands in the pockets of his coat. "Is she here?"

Connie nodded. "There's nothing to be nervous about, and yes she is.. Through there" she gestured towards the room leading off the hallway.

He nodded. "Connie, how much does she.. How much does she know about me? I mean, I don't want to be going in there thinking that I'm someone who's just walked off the street"

"She knows about you Sam, she's knows she has a farther, now it's time for her to meet you.."

He sighed deeply, and nodded heading towards the room. There she was, sat at the table drawing, her toys spread out on the floor in front of her. She was talking to herself. She smiled. "Mummy!." She called loudly before glancing up at the door, seeing Sam.

Sam saw her daughter face drop. "Are you mummy's friend?" She asked confused.

"I'm your daddy Grace" Sam spoke his voice shaking, palms sweating. His heart sunk, the happiness inside had been eaten.

Grace looked as though she was about to cry. "But Mummy says I don't have a daddy, but of you want me to I can draw you a picture, I'm quite good at drawing"

Sam nodded and tried not to sound disappointed. "That would be lovely Grace, I'm just going to find your mum"

"Connie" Sam sighed slightly waiting for a reply.

"Yes?" She called from upstairs, coming to the top of the stairs.

"I'm going to head off now" he tried to hide the emotion, creeping up in his voice.

"I thought you wanted to spend time with your daughter?" She quizzed walking down the first couple of stairs slowly.

Sam shook his head. "She asked me if I was your friend..." He let the sentence hang in the air. "You've just told me she knows about me, I can't do this Connie, not if your going to play games again.." He felt tears welling in his eyes.

Turning around he headed out the door not even bothering to say goodbye. Connie ran down the stairs, opened the door. "Sam.." But he was gone.

Sam walked along, mixed emotion raging in his head. Why did she lie? His own daughter didn't know who he was at all.. Did he tell him that just to comfort him, or was she back to her games, which he remembered well.

He needed a drink. It could have consequences. He didn't care because right now, he needed it. It seems all those earlier questions had been answered.


	4. Chapter 4

His feet hurt. He wondered wether to call a taxi. Sam didn't know his way around here it was probably for the best. Pulling his phone out he looked at his phone. Numerous text

had popped up from Connie. He ignored them.

He couldn't speak to her, not now, for fear he's say something he regret, he really thought she'd changed. The mind games have started yet again, he was used to them he was used to the way she worked, the way her mind ticked. She seemed to get a thrill from winding him. Hurting him, mentally, not good for his fragile state.

Sam stood waiting for the taxi he'd just called for, he'd have to ask the taxi driver for the nearest pub around.

He clenched his fists as he sat back in the taxi, finally arriving 15 minutes later. His mind racing, did he really need this drink? I mean really? He was slipping back into this vicious circle he could feel it. If Connie had just told him the truth. What happens if he did? He didn't have the willpower like he once did to say no.

"Where to mate?" The taxi had asked this twice now. Sam so wrapped up in his own thoughts had only just heard.

"The nearest pub?, sorry I don't know my way round her very well anymore.." He sat back, his mouth dry.

"Ah, that would be "The Sunny inn" then!"

Sam smiled weakly. The sunny inn, what a name for a pub. He thought, he felt anything but.

Walking into the doors, saloon type, he glanced around. He felt sick. Don't do this. His subconscious told him, he ignored it, ordered his first drink.

Which turned into six.

Only 3 o'clock and he was past it, his life on the transpire again.

He felt his phone ringing he fumbled around in his pocket he couldn't see the name printed on the screen but swiped It to the left anyway. He sat on the stool, sipping his beer as he heard a female voice on the other end. Vaguely recognising her voice asking where he was.

He knew it wasn't Connie though. He knew that for defiant.

"In a pub... I ... Think" he didn't care he let out a burp. Her voice was American, she was yelling down the phone at him, the shrill tone making him pull the phone away from his ear.

"Alice.. That .. Is you.. Is it you?, Alice my wife...?" He wasn't making a lot of sense but she understood, She told him she was. He hung up, he didn't want to her not after what she'd done to him.

He sighed, sliding off the bar stool. Staggering towards the door, falling into a woman. In to Connie's arms, she had tracked him down, the pub in questioned wasn't far from her house. "Sam.. How much have you drunk?" He recognised her voice. She shook her head. "Come-on lets get you back.."

He didn't answer just hugged her as she helped him back up the road. "I'm.. A ... Mess..." He slurred.

"Shhhhh" Connie soothed, swaying as he staggered clinging on to her.


	5. Chapter 5

**Short chapter, I'm sorry it late! - I didn't want to abandon so thought I'd better move on with it! Hope you enjoy this next (mini) part , thank you for the reviews! **

**Katie xx**

Connie helped him in to her house. She guided him to the living room where she sat him down, he was slurring something she couldn't make out. She took his shoes off, leaving them by the side of the sofa, during which Sam had fallen into a slumber on the sofa, she gently moved his legs on to the sofa, his head on a cushion and popped a blanket over him. He jerked as she did this, again, a drunken sleepy slur of words began, before falling silent.

Connie watched him, before bending down and stroking his forehead. "Oh Sam.." She began sighing after a while. She couldn't help feel for him she just hoped he'd sleep most of it off by late his evening.

"I'm sorry" It was 8pm now, the soft orange flames of the fire Sam had his eyes fixed on as he heard Connie walked through with a strong coffee for Sam and a tea for herself. He turned to her, sadness in his eyes.

"It okay" Connie began. "Non of this is your fault"

"I shouldn't have just walked out like that, I was just frustrated Connie.." He sighed talking the coffee from her hands, his fingers brushed against her hand. Contact. "She doesn't know me does she?"

Connie shook her head. "I haven't told her anything, she doesn't know anything about you, your a stranger to her"

"But why?" Sam started looking into her eyes. Beautiful eyes. The same eyes he'd looked into so many times before.

Connie sighed. "As long as she has me, her mother she doesn't need anyone else.." She took a sip of her coffee. "Look, I'm sorry Sam, I just didn't think she needed to know about you, but now, seeing you like this Sam, I really think she does, and you, you'd benefit as well, an incentive maybe.." She trailed off.

Sam nodded. "What's happened to me Connie?" He asked this knowing she wouldn't be able to answer. "I'm broken.." He could feel tears pricking his eyes as he ran his hand though his hair.

She took his hand, squeezed it gently. "It's going to be okay.."

The reassurance from her made him flutter, he'd never heard her words so kind. He turned to her edged along the sofa, he fell into her resting his head on her shoulder, the warmth made him feel wanted.

Connie let him, she didn't move, she let him rest there. She yawned, taking a sip of her coffee.

A phone ringing broke the silence. "Sam, is that yours?" Sam fumbled in his pocket, pulling it out he recognised the caller ID. He slid the phone across the floor. "Leave it" he told her, a bit more sharply than intended.

"But Sam it could be important.. Kerian..?"

"No it's not.. I know exactly who it is and I don't want to hear from her"

Her? Connie mind span. Wife? Girlfriend?, the phone rang a few more times before falling silent.

Both Connie and Sam soon, falling asleep on the sofa together.


	6. Chapter 6

Connie edged herself off the sofa slowly, (as to not wake Sam) the next morning, her neck stiff from the way she had fallen asleep. Never again. She thought.

The phone still lay silent on the floor. The fire no longer hot and roaring, it had burned out. Connie hovered over the phone for a few moments before picking it up. 17 missed calls. "Alice" the user name came up at the side.

She must have been out for the count. As she couldn't recall waking to ringing, she wondered if Sam had. She set the phone on the coffee table and reminded herself to ask Sam about "Alice" later. She opened the door to the living room, gently titling her head back, the pain still there. She sighed hearing Grace stirring upstairs, talking to herself, she does that often.

She decided she wasn't going to bother her just yet, but make breakfast.

The smell of bacon and eggs lingered in the living room as Sam stretched, the big sofa giving him the opportunity to do so. He yawned, his head banging almost instantly then. He groaned then sat up. He could here Grace in the kitchen talking to Connie. He smiled.

"Shh Grace" he could here Connie right near the door now, he saw it push open slowly. Her head popped around the door, her locks falling loosely around one shoulder, he could see.

"You're awake I see, breakfast?" She smiled, stood in the door way, her cheeks flushed.

Sam nodded. "Please, paracetamol if you have any.." He smiled, watching a small smirk appear on her face.

"Sam, a doctor always has paracetamol in their household among many many other things.."

A smirk followed on his face as well, he rubbed his forehead. "Thank you, oh and Connie, you've defiantly softened, big style.." He trailed off it.

"Watch otherwise you'll be out on your ear!" She smirked leaving the room. Prizing himself off the sofa, he retrieved the phone from the table. Scrolling through he saw the same name 17 times over.

"I don't want to hear from you, I have nothing to say to you, leave me alone Alice, if your trying to win me back, don't bother" he sent the text and made his way to the kitchen.

"Smells nice, your mummy is a good cooking Grace"

"Oh I do try.." She smiled sitting down orange juice set out on the table. "Tablets" she passed him a pack.

"Thank you" he took a drink of orange juice.

Grace looked up from her plate. "How do you know my name?"

Sam tried his best to not look hurt at this comment even though he knew she didn't know him. He didn't know what to say, he glanced at Connie. She should be really telling her thought Sam.

"This is your Daddy, Grace" Connie looked at her daughter who took a small sip of orange juice.

"But you said I didn't have one" Grace frowned. "Have you just been lying to me the whole time?"

Sam sniggered, he could help it, her daughter sounds so grown up, so like her mother.

Connie nodded. "Yes, Grace I'm sorry.. This is Sam, you daddy"

"How do I know.. You could be a stranger pretending to be my daddy.." She looked confused, pulling the same facial expression Connie did. "Why don't you have any pictures of daddy then?" She turned to Connie, putting a piece of bacon in her mouth.

"He doesn't like the camera" Sam smirked at Connie's comment.

Grace frowned. "Okay, if your my daddy, you have to know my birthday, then I'll believe you.." She stated sitting her little body upright.

"The first of May 2007"

Grace's facial features lite up, she turned to her mother. She smiled at him. "I love you daddy"

"I've finished Mummy" she pushed the plate away from her. "Can I go and play please?"

Connie nodded. "Of course you can.."

Sam watched her run off. He turned to Connie. "Thank you for this opportunity"

"Don't mention It" she stood up taking her plate to the sink. "You finish, I'm going to go for a quick shower, are you okay to just keep an eye on Grace for me?"

Sam smiled. "Absolutely.." Connie brushed past him soon after, he grabbed her hand, she turned around, eye contact. "Thank you so much.." He couldn't thank her enough for what she'd don't since being back, he stood up.

He stroked her cheek with his thumb, she didn't pull away, she felt the connection pulsing though her, her heart started to beat quickly, as their lips met they kissed, a sensation it seemed they'd both been individually longing for. After a while Sam was the first to pull away, he smiled, not saying a word, she too smiled, turning away she walked up the stairs, ready for that shower.

They sat in front of the fire, the same as they had done the night before, Connie and one end Sam at the other, now though the soft sounds of the TV. She wasn't really watching though, on her mind was a question, she didn't know wether to wait until she actually found out by chance or accidentally, or just to bite the bullet, having the opportunity here and now.

"Sam, can I ask you a question?" She turned to him, running her hands through her hair.

"Yes, go ahead" he adverted his eyes away from the telly.

"Who's Alice?" She watched him. "I couldn't help noticing your phone earlier.."

Sam sighed. "If you don't want to talk about it that's fine .." Connie spoke having an after thought.

"Alice, is my wife, well was, we were married for 3 years, that was until she slept with someone else behind my back, playing away for months she was, things also spiralled out of control there as well, if it's not my life it my relationship.." Sam sighed deeply. "The only reason she's ringing is because she wants me back, I've heard things aren't going well with Mr lover boy, so who does she run to? Me.." Sam shook his head.

"I really thought with her, we actually had something, you know found a common ground, you know, I think it may have been my depression that made her run off with another man, I don't really blame her though Connie.."

Connie moved closer, her hand touching his shoulder. "Don't say that, sometimes things don't work out, that's life, but don't blame yourself, non of this is your fault, best not to dwell on it you have to make the best of the here and now"

"Which is you.." Sam muttered looking into her eyes. "If I didn't have you, I don't know where I would be at this moment in time, since coming back, you have made me a lot happier then I was.." He looked at her, his eyes filling with tears. She wrapped her arms around him almost automatically.

He was so tightly strung to all his emotion Sam let go, he sobbed in Connie arms. "It's okay, come on" she whispered choking up herself.

**I don't know about you but this had me tearing up myself!**


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you for all the lovely reviews on this fic! I hope your enjoying it as much as i have been writing it.

His phone rang again, as it had done the times previous, it was a Thursday afternoon of his first weeks holiday and with Connie at work, he had this time to spend with his daughter, he ignored it and allowed the screen to switch off.

Grace walked in the room seconds later putting some board games on the table. "What would you like to play Daddy?" Grace frowned. "Daddy, are you okay?" She asked tilting her head to one side, unaware she looked just like her mother when she did that. Unaware he was staring mindlessly in to space Sam, looked at her daughter.

"Fine Grace, what games have you got for us to play?* "Well i have six but we don't have to play them all, not if you dont want to..." She picked a box up.

"ooh this ones good, operation, me and mummy sometimes play it, she's really good"

"Shall we see if Daddy can beat mummy..." He smiled. Grace clapped her hands and placed the box on the floor. Just as Sam got up his phone flashed again. He sighed. "Grace just give me a minute, poppit"

The phone now in his hand he pressed accept then put his phone to his ear.

"Alice i really don't know what you want but i asked yo-" His sentence was cut short, although his voice was firm, what came next shocked him.

"Im in the UK" She let the words lace in to his ears.

"I need to see you Sam..I miss you.. I love you.."

He shook his head. "love..." He muttered down the phone loud enough so she could here.

"Daddy..."Grace piped, setting Alice off down the phone.

"Where are you? , Sam... Daddy? Do you have another child?"

Sam didn't answer just listened, listened to the tinge of sadness in her words. Maybe, he thought maybe if they talked, he could get things totally out in the open, he would find awaý through this mess and they could go their separate ways. Then it would be him cutting all ties.

"Where are you?" Sam asked soon ushering Grace to stand up. Alice fell silent for a moment.

"Some place called Heathrow airport.."

"Right, im coming, just to clear the air, nothing else after this i want nothing more to do with you" Sam exhaled loudly. Waiting for her response but there was none she ad hung up, typical woman Sam thought.

As they neared the door, he held his daughters hand, with the spare he key he had been given by Connie he locked the door.

"Can we play when we get back, when mummy gets back from work?" She asked not expecting to be dragged away from her game.

"Of course we can sweetheart" Alice was sitting at a table with a cup of coffee when Sam and Grace arrived. Her blonde her pulled back into a pony tale, it had to be said she was a Chrissie Williams look-a-like, in every sense of the word. She glanced at him over the other side of the table, then down at the little girl beside him.

"Couldn't you have left her where she lives whilst we talked huh?"

"Not on her own, no"He frowned. Taking a seat pulling Grace onto his knee. "Why are you here?.." His tone was firm, he felt he needed to be, no more walking around on egg shells anymore, she was the one in the wrong.

"Its David, uh, he's so controlling, he doesn't let me go out on my own, i have to ring him every second of the day tell him where iam, i cant go back there Sam, its torture.." She trailed off expecting sympathy.

She didn't get any ."you made your bed Alice, you lie in it.. I thought my depression was the reason you did what you did...silly to think that but that's exactly what i thought" he sighed.

"Im sorry" The words formed in her mouth but came out like a squeak in reality.

She watched Sam stand up, ready to leave. "You know, i came all the way over here to tell you something i thought you'd like to know, the fact im finishing with Dave and there could still be a chance for us to make amends but, im getting nothing in return!" Her voice raised, tempers fraying.

Sam span around. "What do you expect me to say?!, and don't you dare even think there's a chance for "us" any more, that isn't going to happen!" He snorted "And as for that whole spiel being something I want to hear? To be honest i don't give a monkeys, you brought this all on yourself and it was me who got hurt in the process.

"Daddy..."Sam looked down.

"Its over Alice, we both know that and for the record, she is my daughter, yes, and her mother is 10 times the woman you"ll ever be., don't contact me again."

Anger cursed through him, as well as sadness, to be honest a whole mix of emotions as he watched Alice walk off without so much of a backwards glance. He exhaled. His phone vibrated in his pocket, fishing it out he read the name printed across. *Connie*

"Where are you?" She began.

"Heathrow airport, can you come pick us up?" Tears stung in his eyes realizing the gravity of the situation, at least now he could move on with his life without her in it.


End file.
